Best of Both Worlds

I just want the best of both worlds. That's all. Is that too much to ask? I didn't think by the end of the school year I'd truly want to stay in Logan. But now that the school year is speeding to an ending I just can't come to terms with the fact that I'm leaving this whole new life I've made for myself. Well I haven't really made it for myself at all actually it just happened. Everything has just fallen into place so perfectly. And yet everything is so perfect & totally amazing back home two. I just want it all I want my Logan life and Naperville life to just mesh into one. But sadly I have these two alternate lives across the country from each other. 

I swear (but i don't) the only time I get on this blogger journal is when I can't sleep at night but have wound down enough to think ab out everything in life. 

After friday night's True Aggie Nights Dance, Court Kiley & I all jumping into Kris's bed and waking him up to go find the best slurpees in Logan at 2 am, writing with my left hand, driving around with the windows rolled down and blasting music, 6 hour track meet, sock and jersey tan lines, flag football on the quad, bon fire in the canyon, & playing things with mix of "Fez" and my friends I just can't imagine leaving this new "world". A whole new world a dazzling place i've never known (yes Aladdin). And yet the reasons I love all of these things so much is beacuse they all remind me of home in one way or another. Everything just felt so free and easy...just. like. summer. & home. And I just love it! 

Well now that my brain is shutting down I should probably stop rambling on and on and go to bed. Alright well goodnight goodnight on this blessed day of jocelyn's birth! 

I want it all I want it all I want it alllll. Basically i just wish there were a way to "mix it all together and you know you've got the best of both worlds". Oh the wise words of HM hannah montana aduhhh! 

I'm a tormented soul right now. So restless day & night. Just can't figure it out. End of story.

College Lesson #1: Don't leave you're room after 1 p.m. nothing good comes from it.

This is before my body was skinned. We were warned.

If I could go back in time and stop myself would I? Probably not. Not that I loved getting road rash on my butt, legs, arms & shoulder. Live to learn another day. 

More to come but gots to go to ward prayer. Apple sauce cookies tonights:D

"It all works out. Don't worry."

"It isn't as bad as you sometimes think it is. It all works out. Don't worry. I say to myself every morning. It all works out in the end. Put your trust in God, and move forward with faith and confidence in the future. The Lord will not forsake us. He will not forsake us, if we will put our trust in Him, if we will pray to Him, if we will live worthy of His blessings, He will hear our prayers"

-Gordon B. Hinkley

So Kiley & Courtney just back from an extra long easter weekend. They got snowed in Draper, yea I know how ridiculous is that for Easter & spring season. But anyways so of course I was upstairs helping them unpack...aka sitting at courtney's desk when I cam across that quote by President Hinkley. Ah I just love it oh so much! Really looking back on it all, thinking back to that last night at home and that amazing last week at home and how incredibly hard it was to leave it all, it really wasn't as bad as I thought. I "moved forward with faith and confidence in the future"and to see how things have turned out and the amazing friends and people I've met I can't imagine my life at any other school. And honestly the Lord was with me every day those first few weeks, and I'm so grateful for that comfort and support. Of course my mom and friends were there for me too but they were so far away, to be exact 1213 miles plus!

Anyways, after catching up after a very long weekend Court told me that she called the landlord aka SHES STAYING! That was just some of the best news I could have heard today! I just love that crazy girl. Fall 2010 is going to be the best semester yet! Life hardly turn out the way we expect but right now I love how my unexpectedly my life is turning out, and for the good too. Got my fall schedule figured out, living arrangements=set & they rock! , i start running this week, may be seeing my fabulous mother this weekend, end of year bash(in the snow? hah) seeing last song this week, poker night tmrw with all of on campus housing (i'm a dealer), nurf gun wars, and summer is exactly 1 month away from this exact day!

I like writing on this blog. But who knows how long I can keep this up for especially with finals coming up so soon! Ayee well life is great even when I'm dying of coughing and lack of sleep.

Dieing or Dying It Won't Matter When I'm Dead

Don't worry about finding that perfect black dress to wear to my funeral I think I'm going to make it though this weekend. I've got a lot to live for. My future career as a model begins on Monday; modeling a burlap sack. But hey we've all got to start somewhere. Also in 6 weeks I could be on my way home back to Naperville. Home sweet home.

I think that's one of the main things I miss while out here at college. I don't live in a home I live in an apartment, and it's just not the same. It's not the same without little siblings running around and parents going about their own business but not far when you call out their name. Being at Talia's house was probably one of my favorite weekends of this year. Because life was just so easy. Mrs. Greer made me feel like I'd been to their house every Friday night for the past year. Playing cards with Zeek and all his little 10 year old friends. It was a relief and actually incredibly fun to just sit around a kitchen table in a worn & cozy home. Age really didn't matter at that table 3 college girls, 1 senior in high school and probably seven 10 year old boys, one 50 something year old mom and dad. In face it was our variety of ages and experiences and such different lives that seemed to make the table to lively and fun. I just miss that, here at college everyone lives in apartments or old beat up houses, but not very many homes.

Ah i just can't wait until summer. I just love it! Sun. Bonfires. Chacos. Acroyoga. Pools. Bikes. Popsicles. Running. Friends. Family. What more could i want

Mother Nature Out Did Us all on April 1st

I'm currently wasting away in Logan, Utah college town in northern oootah. I haven't attended class since Tuesday due to the fact I'm dieing. But not to worry I've got a prescription for strep throat so life can only go uphill from here, but you should probably dig out that whore-ish black dress and dusty black suite to wear to my funeral except Annaliesa- she's wearing white with black boots. And my deteriorating bone has calcified so double bonus. Still cannot run but hey the water treadmill is actually fun when it's snowing outside. Mother nature pulled the best April Fool's trick on Logan. SIX INCHES OF SNOW IN APRIL! How ridiculous is that. Well can't wait until I am healed so my nerf gun and I can begin wreaking havoc on Utah State. Happy Easter- aka happy REAL birthday Jesus. Can't wait to make and eat Jesus rolls, also known as ressurection rolls.